My Girlfriend Is Trying To Force Me To Shave My Butt Hair

My gf(18F) gave me (19M) an ultimatum over my “hygiene.” What can i do at this point?

To start off, I’m in distraught. As a guy I assume we all have hairy butts. It’s normal. I’ve been in a relationship with my gf for almost 7 months, throughout this time we’ve met up on several occasions since we live in different places. We’ve done the deed as most couples do. Obviously she’s seen all of me and i’ve seen all of her. I love her just the way she is. Apparently thats not the case for her. Once, i was having dhiarrea do to a virus in my stomach and i had to use the bathroom more than once and very frequently. At the time i was sleeping over at her house for about 5 days in a row.

Eventually came the time where she had the idea of applying vaseline to my butt to stop it from hurting, and when she was doing that she said i had “poop stuck in my butt”, apparently is was due to my butt hairs. I was emberrased obviously but come to find out it was just knotted hair in the shape of a ball. Since then not much has been said about that topic. It would come up from time to time and she would say i was her ” hairy butt syndrome husband”. I didn’t think much of it and thought it was not a big deal and funny. Today for some reason we were playing a game together and for some reason she had the “bright” idea to tell our teammates my business and say that i had poop stuck in my butt once.

Everyone laughed at me and made me feel bad and insecure. I tried to laugh along because what else can i do. Later on throughout today she keeps mentioning “go shave your butt”, and at some point says “go shave your butt before 12 pm or im not talking to you”. i took this as a joke because its always been a joke, or so i thought. And just now she gave me an ultimatum saying “if you dont shave your butt i cant be with you”. She continued to ignore me after i texted her “hello” and “are you there” for about 45 minutes.

And she spoke out recently saying “i think this is a dealbreaker unironically i tried to bring it up in a joking manner but its pretty nasty if you think about it”. In the end i told her she was fucked up for making it seem like a joke, making fun of me infront of the others and then giving me an ultimatum out of the blue like if i was supposed to know she was serious. Please share your thoughts and let me know what you think about this.
Source: Reddit.com

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